Sounds Like Weird
09 October 2004
It’s tiring having to tell people all the time, “No, I can’t have that, it’s probably got wheat in it.” Bread they understand, pasta they sometimes do, but items such as Rice Dream (a rice milk), they’re less likely to. Nor do most people have any clue that soy sauce almost invariably contains wheat.
Friday night, I went to a restaurant and, after looking at the menu, asked if I could have lobster scampi served on potatoes. He said they only had french fries. I asked them if they cooked the fries separately from the fish and seafood they also served — they did. What else did they cook in that fryer? Only fries.
Fine, I said, I’ll take the scampi over fries.
“The chef said it wouldn’t be very good,” the waiter offered. “We could put it over pasta.”
“Look,” I said, “eating wheat causes internal bleeding and destroys my intestines. I’ll take it over fries.”
Waiter said OK, then went on to take the rest of the table’s order.
A few minutes later, he comes out, apologetic. Chef has refused to make said order because it “wouldn’t be any good.” Waiter says there’s a lot of other seafood they serve with fries, I could have some of that.
“It’s all battered in wheat. Eating wheat causes internal bleeding and destroys my intestines.” Repetition is sometimes necessary.
“Well, you could have steak tips.”
Right, at a seafood place. Not. (I’m glad I didn’t, it looked incredibly dull)
Instead, I had a shrimp appetizer after verifying that it wouldn’t contain any flour of any kind. I also ordered potato skins.
Despite the chef’s assertion about “it wouldn’t be any good,” the two of us who ordered potato skins found ours to be BLACK they were burned so badly.
Ugh.
But it took three go-arounds and about 5 minutes of interaction with the waitroid to even get that far. I’ve literally been brought to tears because I’ve been so frustrated about food (and so embarrassed by the problems food causes me).
If someone says they can’t have wheat: believe them. It doesn’t matter if they’re imagining it, chances are they’re not.